A Tangled Web

Dr. Charles Lowry, a pastor, psychologist, and author, has written about the behavior patterns of those who practice deception. He shared a humorous story about a lady that bumped into him at a grocery store when he was a pastor in Dallas. She raved about what a great man of God he is, and as her proof she cited that her husband has to be at work at 6:30 AM, and he drove by the church on his way and saw the pastor’s car already in the parking lot. This lady thought her pastor was so spiritual for being at the church so early.

Faced with a decision, Dr. Lowry humbly thanked her for the compliment and chose not to tell her that he had carpooled home with his wife the night before and that she drove him to the church that morning at 9:00. That moment of deception led him to continue digging himself into a deeper hole.

He became worried that if his car was not in the parking lot at 6:30 each morning, he would not appear to be as spiritual. After all, he is a great man of God. He began to use his energy to find ways to leave his car at the church over night more often, using his wife and the youth pastor as his chauffeurs. His strange behavior began to alienate the pastor from those around him, and his important duties were being neglected in pursuit of the impression of holiness.

While I imagine that story was embellished for comedic effect, the principle applies. When we practice deception we waste so much time and mental energy trying to keep up the lie. We often engage in strange behavior during this charade, alienating ourselves from the people around us. It is so much easier to just come clean, but we often times delay the process in our stubbornness.    

In his poem Marmion, Walter Scott famously wrote, “Oh, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.” The deceiver expends his energy having to remember what he has told everyone, and before long, he has himself tangled in a web of his own lies.

The Bible offers a simpler way of living. It is called honesty. Not only is it the Ninth Commandment, Colossians 3:9 further instruct, “ Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices.” Honesty is not the best policy, it should be the only policy.